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Lost Phone (Datapanic in the Year Zero) - Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Mark Rimmell

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Lost Phone (Datapanic in the Year Zero) [Oct. 25th, 2016|06:21 pm]
Mark Rimmell
The other night (3am) I was setting off to bed. Usually, the last three things I do before putting head to pillow are;

1. Plug in phone to charge, and occasionally set the alarm.

2. Take off glasses.

3. Turn off light.

Not always in that precise order. On the night in question, I looked around for my phone. No phone! Checked in bedroom, living room, went out to car. Did the same again while calling the phone on the landline. Knowing full well that I keep my phone on silent and non-vibrate, well I may see it light up. After an hour of increasingly frantic searching, I had decided that I'm probably lost it at Dover B&Q (the last place I remember having it) I'd knelt down to check the size of some wooden trim. It was now 4am and I was fully convinced the phone must have fallen into the wrong hands. I imagined a terrorist cell were emptying my bank account into a number of shell companies or offshore bank facades and Ayman al-Zawahiri was currently reading my private email. It was only a matter of time before I'd be wrongly implicated in an attack, either because I'm unwittingly funded it, or my phone would be used to trigger a dirty bomb or both scenarios at once. Yeah I'd had a drink earlier in the evening and by 4am I was losing the plot. All the same, I was mentally kicking myself for not taking my own advice and password protecting the phone.

What would have helped is having some sort of "find my phone" app on the phone. I'd set one such app up on the phone when I got it, however, I hadn't quite got around to reinstalling it after the big crash/reset debacle earlier this year. Just as I was about to go and reset the passwords to my paypal, online banking, facebook... Jo had woken up assessed the situation and tried ringing it at the same moment I shook out the duvet for one last desperate check and I was rewarded with the sight of my phone hurtling across the room with the incoming call screen brightly lit up. Had the phone crashed to the floor exploding into a dozen bits I couldn't have cared less, it hadn't fallen into evil hands and I wasn't going to have to explain myself to the authorities. As it happened the phone survived its brief flight and was soon being treated to a new "find my phone" app, password protection, and encryption.